Food baby

Dear Diary,
 Easter... is a beautiful time. But who ever decided Easter should involve chocolate, probably died from all the teenage girls sitting on him/her. Squishing that poor soul to death from all the weight gained from the huge amounts of chocolate consumed.

 I am usually pretty good at avoiding food I shouldn't have, or taking just small amounts. But today once I walked through the door, there was LITERALLY a HUGE BUCKET absolutely FILLED with devilish CHOCOLATE! I was hoping that the hooligan gang of 12 year old boys had eaten it all up the day before at the Carter Family Easter BBQ. I mean it makes sense! Where else did they get all that energy!? They were bouncing off the stars!

 Anyway, of course me being a girl... in the same room with this bucket of chocolate... with no one else in the room... I just stared at it. That chocolate and I had a stare down... NO SURPRISE... it won. I jumped on the couch flicked on Netflix, watched a super depressing movie and hoped to eat only a couple chocolates (3 or 4). But I ended up consuming so much, that I ended up eating off my belly like some obese hippo. (Yeah hippos are already fat, now imagine an obese hippo... Isn't pretty!) WHY WOULD SOMEONE LEAVE A BUCKET OF CHOCOLATE ON THE COUCH?! WHY?!

 PLEASE OH PLEASE. If you have a teenage girl living in your home... unless you want to be sat on and be squished like the person at the beginning of this post... don't, I repeat DON'T leave a bucket of chocolate on a couch in front of the TV. Although she will act like she is in heaven at the moment, in a matter of seconds when all the chocolate is gone, you will see a food baby protruding from her stomach and fiery eyes screaming for the guilty to admit he/she was the culprit for this terrible sin. You don't want to be the one sat on... Trust me.

-Tanisha